To some divorced parents:
Thank you to everyone who has gotten a divorce because they gave it their all and it wasn’t working. There’s a time to move on.
Thank you for not “protecting” your children because you think it’s better for them if you stay in a dead marriage and pretend like everything’s okay (kids are way smarter than that).
Let’s agree that on the big level, you have no idea what’s best for your kids in the long run. Some kids of divorce are liberated when their parents finally pull the plug. Others are devastated (and, there’s a spectrum of everything in between). Both are an important part of that child’s path and karma. Both are gifts and sadly one is more accepted as such than the other.
So, thanks for having the courage to put yourself first. And, if you are divorced and really smart, you know your relational patterns will follow you until you face them. And for the even more courageous ones, thank you for not blaming your X for your failed marriage. I always know when I meet a mature divorced adult whey they can acknowledged where they came up short, where they were blocked, and where they fell asleep while still holding respect for their partner.
We all have wounds. Welcome to the challenging path of relationship.