Being A Warrior Parent

Art by Bryce Widom

Art by Bryce Widom

Some of us are in the business of helping people be who they are, which I consider to be “the spiritual path.” We are typically teachers, healers, guides, or facilitators of some kind. It’s a big role to lead and help the peeps in this way. And I want to make a distinction between two kinds of teachers. 1) teachers and 2) warrior teachers. Both have a place. As a parent, I’m a big fan of the warrior teacher because she is willing to be a work in progress, showing her students what’s behind the curtain. Revealing his limitations as they arise. Being fierce and boundaried when necessary. Listening, learning and surrendering with humility as she goes.

But why take this approach? Because that’s what the warrior parent does. And the parent is the ultimate teacher with the ultimate job– raising a human being. The warrior parent is willing to show his children who he is, as he is. She falls down, makes mistakes, tries to hide, and lashes out as she inevitably will. Then, he rises back up, repairs the hurt, and returns to being an adult. She keeps going to show her kids the art of being human. He shows his kids the light and the dark within, while embracing both. She teaches them to own their light and take responsibility for their dark. If he dislikes himself, he goes and works on loving himself, so his kids don’t have to ingest that transmission. On and on… The value of being a warrior parent of course is that we give our children a realistic model of being human. We don’t pretend to be something other than ourselves.

It can be sobering to flail so hard with our children in our attempts to raise them. Plus the roles get confusing. Who’s teaching who? It’s eye-opening and mind-blowing to be a student to these little people on a daily basis. The warrior parent is willing, even excited, to stop pretending we know everything and instead get on board with the experience of being a student in order to receive the downloads our kids are bringing to us. To teach and model being ourselves in this way requires tremendous courage and humility.

So, thank you to the warrior teachers out there who are willing to share your vulnerable being-ness with your students and your children. Thank you for burning through the cultural pressures and noise in order to demonstrate human warriorship.

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