The Power of Celebration

picture-1What is your relationship to fun, play, and celebration?

I was never much on celebration. My old man taught me that you don’t celebrate until you are on the summit. I also learned that celebrating was bragging and bad, especially if you didn’t win. So, I would just keep my personal victories to myself.

We humans are like this sometimes. We don’t celebrate unless we’ve won the big game or new salary. Vince Lombardy has a famous quote which is the credo of sports teams everywhere—“Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing.” Unless we see “winning” as something we do everyday, this attitude can perpetuate us being hard on ourselves and prolongs recognition about what is truly lovable and great in us right now.

Another classic example is my own birthday. For years I would poo poo my  birthday and not tell anyone. Then when my birthday would come and go without anyone noticing, I would feel resentful and unseen or unmet. The last couple of years I have been practicing celebrating openly and allowing the love to come pouring in from others. In fact, I just sent an evite out for my birthday celebration party.

Why celebrate?

Just like stuffing our sadness or anger, when we stuff our joy and love, we shut down that energy in our system and our bandwidth for feeling life experiences remains narrow. As my friend Justice Marshall reminded me, when we celebrate, we invite more of that energy into our lives. His words ring so true for me.

Not only that, but when we celebrate and share it with someone, we allow ourselves to be seen for who we are. We are also practicing self-love and self-respect. Sometimes we want others to notice or see how great we are because we are not willing to celebrate ourselves. Then we resent them for not reading into us. But it is our job to share our wins with others.

What to do?

So, I invite you to celebrate where you are right now in your life. Celebration is one of the core pillars of being a revolutionary man. We must learn to celebrate….a lot!

Celebration is not done to make yourself feel better or meant to distract yourself from your pain. It is simply to balance the scales of what is true. While it’s true that there might be pain in your life, there is also pleasure. There is always something little to celebrate. Most of us tend to focus on “lack” or what’s wrong with our lives as opposed to what is going well, what is working and where the love is.

Here are 6 simple ways to celebrate:

  • First, notice your relationship to celebration.  Is it hard for you? Easy?
  • Create a top-ten list of things you can genuinely celebrate right now (my list is below, add yours)
  • One at a time, create a ritual to celebrate each. What are you celebrating about each? Why?
  • Find another person or people and celebrate with them
  • Make a commitment to start celebrating when things go well
  • Purposely celebrate along the way. Don’t wait until your are on the summit.

Also, consider making a strong commitment to make this a regular part of your life. Here’s commitment 10 of the ten commitments of manhood.

Commitment 10 – Gratitude

I commit to having fun, celebrating what is already “right” in my life and being grateful for what I have. I also will practice an attitude of gratitude for every challenge in my life and seek to embrace its wisdom.

My top ten list:

Eleven (couldn’t help it) things I’m celebrating right now:

  1. My relationship with myself
  2. My relationship with my wife
  3. My new 5 month old son
  4. My Dad
  5. My work
  6. My sense of power, privilege and freedom I experience living where I do
  7. My 108-day training and it’s mid-way point and the 9 men involved
  8. My friends–you all know who you are
  9. Nature & wilderness nearby
  10. The fact that I wrote this post
  11. New doors opening with HUGE possibilities

What about YOU? Share your list below.

Remember celebrating builds the celebratory energy around you. Watch this video all the way through as an example of what happens to others when one person celebrates:

Share your top ten list below!

17 Comments

  • Luis Solis

    Reply Reply June 23, 2009

    (all ten are top ten….not in priority order for me)

    1. being an energetic man — I dig it
    2. being a strong lover
    3. being a father (wonderful chaos in my life)
    4. being a rain-maker
    5. my pillows (love them…hand-picked…it matters!!)
    6. my partner/wife…she’s funny, cool and unique
    7. my freedom/ability/desire to travel so so much
    8. my brother Rene…he’s fantastic…I am proud of him
    9. my boys…they are spirit in physical form for me
    10. my clients: I am blessed to have such wonderful 2-way relationships in the commercial world

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      I love it Luis! YES. your pillows? Awesome. I can relate.

  • Fabio

    Reply Reply June 23, 2009

    Smiles Smiles!!! The video was incredibly powerful for me, very inspiring. The power of one man (or woman) just following what feels do good regardless of others’ opinions. AHO!!
    I am celebrating:

    1. My discovery of the silly side of myself, free to express myself in whichever way it comes out
    2. My incredible group of friends and my strong relationship with them
    3. Nature, trees, the fire, the sun, water in the creek and in the ocean
    4. Letting go of preconceived outcomes and appreciate life as it is in the present moment.
    5. My mentors and the elders and their inspiring wisdom
    6. The Goddesses of this Earth and specially the ones who, through their presence and radiance, bring me closer to who I am truly am
    7. Kisses and hugs
    8. Reggae music and dancing energetically
    9. The power of stillness, meditation and T’ai C’hi
    10. My life, the projects in my near future and the people I have helped with my being on this planet.

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      Bring on the silly side bro!!!!

  • Justice Marshall

    Reply Reply June 23, 2009

    Of course I love this post Jayson!

    I too used to downplay my own Birthdays, my joy, my wins.
    Not anymore. Now I have a vision of life as one conscious celebration.

    I realized one Thanksgiving Day in a flash of insight that true gratitude has no boundaries. It’s like an on/off switch. You’re either grateful… or not. The rest is story/judgement.
    Celebration springs from gratitude. If the switch is “turned on” life is one big celebration.

    Thanks for this opportunity and reminder.

    I am celebrating:
    1. My wife – whether I’m experiencing her as a radiant Goddess.. or otherwise. I celebrate her joyfulness and inspiration. And I celebrate the opportunities she brings when she challenges me.
    2. My children and all my family.
    3. My coach and friend Jean-Pierre LeBlanc.
    4. My clients and all the men that are bringing conscious, positive masculinity to their relationship and to the world.
    5. Health and wellness – mine and others.
    6. Abundance in all its forms
    7. God/the creator/spirit
    8. Ancestors
    9. The georgia basin ecosystem
    10. naps

    OK – now I’m gonna check out that video.

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      Thanks again brother! You’re a napper? that’s so great. I come and go. ohhh, Ancestors? thanks for the reminder.
      J

  • Joshua Gribschaw-Beck

    Reply Reply June 24, 2009

    1. I am expressing myself more and more free daily while being careful of other people’s boundries.

    2. I have the self confidence to do what other people might consider crazy things! :O)

    3. I am lucky to be supported by the Revolutionary Men’s Team and other amazing men and women in my life.

    4. I am lucky to see all the wonderful and amazing things that people are doing through Facebook.

    5. I am grateful to be able to serve so many students in my work environment.

    6. I am grateful for the lessons I learn about myself, others and life at my job.

    7. I am grateful that I am becoming a stronger master of self.

    8. I am grateful that I have the awareness I have and that I’ve been blessed with the skills that make and have potential to make huge impact in the world.

    9. I am grateful for the food on my plate and the bed I have to sleep in.

    10. I am celebrating wholistic, naturopathic medicine, and yoga!

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      Number 1 had me feeling open and inspired. Thanks JGB!

  • Derek Markham

    Reply Reply June 25, 2009

    Thanks for this post – it’s a message we need to spread!

    As a mentor of mine says,
    “It’s hard to be hateful when you’re grateful.”

    My list:
    1. I celebrate the health of my family.
    2. I celebrate the amazing opportunities that come my way every day.
    3. I celebrate my community of supportive people.
    4. I celebrate all of the challenges that force me to rise above.
    5. I celebrate the things that make me different.
    6. I celebrate the future – the miracles already on their way.
    7. I celebrate the fact that turning 40 was empowering, not depressing.
    8. I celebrate the important work that you are doing with this site.
    9. I celebrate my relationship with my father, which is better than it has ever been.
    10. I celebrate this new tribe of conscious men.

    Cheers!

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      Thanks for playing Derek. So good to have your presence here. HUGE! Thanks for the saying of your mentor. Excellent!

  • David Cates

    Reply Reply June 25, 2009

    Right on, Jayson! Celebration is an incredibly powerful force in my life.

    Here’s my list today:

    1. The fact that more and more men are waking up and stepping up.

    2. The beloved friends and intimates who keep me in the flow of love.

    3. Each and every moment is another chance to plug into the miracle of being alive.

    4. The powerful women who consistently love me into going deeper.

    5. My amazing healthy body.

    6. The work that sustains and energizes me every day.

    7. The sprawling community of men & women who are, like me, finding more healing & empowering ways to use our sexuality.

    8. My relationship with the Creator.

    9. The fact that I get to travel to such amazing places, and am greeted with such love & hospitality.

    10. All the new technologies like Facebook that make distance obsolete, and bring me clients from all over the world.

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      Yes to number 1 on your list. It is so true. I can feel it building–more men waking up and stepping up. Thank you sir!

      J

  • Chris Taylor

    Reply Reply June 26, 2009

    Thank you so much Jayson for all the great ideas and motivations that you have shared with me through the year and especially for your recent work with the revolutionary man site/blog.

    Here is my top-ten list of what I am celebrating now.

    1. My whole self, I am truly blessed to be living this life.
    2. My parents, each in their own right.
    3. My friend Kipp, for his amazing presence and support.
    4. My girl-friend Emily, and how lucky we are to have found each other.
    5. The well being of all my loved ones.
    6. The amazing teachers in the world that are so accessible today.
    7. The wealth of my environment (food, art, music, technology).
    8. The peace and cooperation in our world.
    9. The evolution or blossoming of human consciousness.
    10. Yoga, what a great gift and much needed balance for my self and others.

    • jayson

      Reply Reply June 29, 2009

      Thanks Chris, makes me want to come visit sometime in Portland. Thanks for being such an inquisitive man.
      J

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